


Instinct and Reason

by President Romana (asoldandtrueasthesky)



Category: Doctor Who (1963), Gallifrey (Big Finish Audio)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-04
Updated: 2016-11-04
Packaged: 2018-08-24 01:13:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8350522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asoldandtrueasthesky/pseuds/President%20Romana
Summary: Romana and Leela take a break from life in the Capitol to gallivant around Paris. Of course, having a peaceful holiday is hard when someone's stealing art again.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [shinebrightlikeanimon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinebrightlikeanimon/gifts).



 “The Doctor said we were going to Paris once.”

Romana pushed a lever down. “And you ended up several light years away, running for your lives?”

“Victorian London. The Doctor said it was close enough.”

“He never could fly her right.” Romana quickly jammed the dimensional stabilisers up as the console rocked with turbulence. “Tried for Gallifrey, ended up in the wrong dimension. Thankfully.”

“She was temperamental.” Leela said. “But I liked that. It made her more than a machine, like K-9.”

Romana shrugged. “She still flew better when someone who’d actually passed the temporal exam _first_ time around piloted. But I know what you mean, the Presidential TARDISes are dreadfully characterless.” She popped her head out of the door and grinned. “Bang on. Middle of the Louvre.” She took Leela’s hand, pulling her out with her.

Leela looked around, wide-eyed, while Romana watched tourists take pictures of the TARDIS, apparently believing it to be a work of art of some description. Leela soon wandered over to the Mona Lisa, drawn by the crowd surrounding it. Romana followed, while Leela listened to the idle chatter around them.

“Romana, these men are saying it is not real,” Leela hissed, “Do they not believe what is in front of their eyes?”

“Oh, it’s a Da Vinci original, don’t believe all those conspiracy theories. It’s just probably not _the_ original, he made several, you know. But then I suppose it makes a difference, these things do seem to be about uniqueness and having ridiculous amounts of money to throw away.”

“Braxiatel says it is about preserving history.”

“Braxiatel is a pretentious git who recklessly broke every single Law of Time for his Collection but it _is_ one of the nicest illegal things he’s ever done.”

Leela moved on to the next painting, a glint of mischief in her eyes. “Narvin says he has paintings of you in there.”

“Does he? Well, I can assure you, I didn’t sit for them. My ego isn’t that big," said Romana. 

“Narvin once said your ego was the size of a planet.”

“Did he?” Romana moved past the next few paintings. “Leela, are you trying to get Narvin in trouble with me?”

Leela grinned. “It is not hard. Your bickering in the Axis stole all my sleep.”

“We don’t bicker.” Romana said airily. “We debate.”

“Yes, about very important things.” Leela nodded, her grin widening. “Affairs of state, Braxiatel’s moustache, who’s hogging the blankets.”

“Yes, well,” she coughed, “I’m the President.”

Leela nodded in mock seriousness. “Which makes your blankets very important affairs of state.”

“Exactly.” She walked forward, as dignified as a Time Lord could be after reminded of the long nights they’d all spent huddled together in the Axis. “Do you want anything from the gift shop?”

-

Leela frowned. “These portions are very small.”

“Mmm.” Romana gave the food an experimental poke. “Outrageously expensive, really, but I can just bill it all to the capitol.”

Leela dug into the food with her fingers, oblivious to the strange looks she was getting, and the glares Romana was giving in return, daring anyone to comment or complain. “Are you enjoying this?”

Romana shrugged. “I’m not sure. It seems to be what one does in Paris.”

“Did you do it with the Doctor?” asked Leela.

She considered it. “We were rather busy with saving the world and having guns shoved at our heads. We did the louvre.”

“I think I’d prefer that.”

Romana raised an eyebrow. “I’m afraid I can’t magic plots to destroy human civilisation out of thin air, but trouble does usually seem to find us.”

Leela looked around, and lowered her voice. “That man is being suspicious. He just took a parcel from another man who is in a hurry to get out.”

Romana looked over to where she was pointing, surprised to see Duggan, of all people, surreptitiously tucking something into his coat’s inside pocket. After quickly nodding to Leela, she walked over to him, glancing at the plate of food he'd barely touched, before saying, “I do hope it was only eggs broken in the making of that omelette.”

His head jerked up, confusion quickly replaced by disbelief. “Romana? It can’t be!”

“The very same.” She said, with a smile.

“Twenty five years, hardly a mark on you! If only time had been as kind to me.”

“Oh, I’m a lot older than 150, I can assure you.” She almost wished it had only been a quarter of a century for her. The centuries had changed her so much more than decades could ever have changed him, but not in ways that he could see.

He blinked and then, presumably deciding it was best not to question that, asked, “Where’s the Doctor?”

“Somewhere dangerously exciting, I expect. This time I’m in the company of my friend Leela.”

“How’d you do?”

Leela approached him finally, half cautious, half curious. “You know the Doctor?”

“About as much as I know Romana. Those were the good old days, weren’t they? Running around Paris, fighting weird alien things, fighting people, fighting old Scarlioni.”

“It was one day, Duggan, but I suppose saving the planet does instil a certain sense of camaraderie.”

“Hang on, Leela, is that a knife there? Nicely concealed, I almost didn’t notice!” He said, way too loudly. A waiter soon asked them to leave.

Romana sighed as they walked outside. “You’re as subtle as ever.”

“Sorry.”

“Never mind, we weren’t enjoying it anyway.”  

“Oh, I know a little stand down here that does some really good pancakes. My treat?”

“I am still hungry.” Leela nodded.

The stall Duggan led them to did, by the smell of things, serve appetising food and it was better value than the restaurant. That didn’t stop Duggan from fumbling around in his wallet for spare euros.

Romana shook her head with a smile. “I’ll pay.”

Duggan, sheepish, muttered a relieved thanks and Romana soon returned with a stack of crepes to share.

After only a few bites, Leela declared, “This food is good! The Doctor was right about chocolate.”

Romana raised an eyebrow. “Better than Gallifreyan cuisine, I take it?”

“You Time Lords have nothing of the sort. You package meals into tiny pills and call that a hunt.”

“It’s efficient.”

“It’s boring.”

“Not the first time we’ve been accused of similar, I’ll admit.”

“Time Lords?” Duggan asked, looking extremely out of his depth. “That’s what you lot are?”

“Well, I am. Terribly pompous name, I know.”

He hesitated. “You don’t have, like, your own version of the FBI, do you? I mean, am I safe, knowing the Truth? ‘Cos I’ve never heard of Time Barons or Lords or whatever on the news.”

“We have a CIA.”

“Do not worry, Time Lords are not dangerous. They are too busy tripping over their own laws and paperwork to be anything but dull.”

“I’d beg to differ.”

“ _You_ are very dangerous.” Leela amended.

“And what, all my near death experiences were from papercuts?” Romana shook her head. “The efficiency of the CIA aside, you have nothing to worry about, Duggan. I have friends in rather lofty places.”

“Good thing too. If your people are all like you and the Doctor, I wouldn’t want to get on your bad sides.”

“Thankfully, they’re not all geniuses.”

“But none of them are modest.” Leela grinned.

Romana took a dainty bite of her crepe, rather than reply to that. “So, Duggan, what were you doing in that restaurant? You looked a bit out of place, if you don’t mind me saying.”

Duggan twitched and muttered something about it being another client.

“More art thefts to investigate?”

“Something like that.”

“You investigate things?” Leela asked, finishing off the last of Romana’s pancake.

“I’m a PI, it’s my job. I’ve solved many a crime.” he said.

“And stalked many a spouse.” added Romana, far from impressed.

“That too. But I’m very good at my job. D’you two do _it_ for a living? You know,” he lowered his voice conspiratorially, “hunting aliens?”  

“Oh, I gave that up years ago. I’m a politician.” Romana frowned and added as an afterthought, “And a spy, I suppose. Not as exciting as it sounds.”

“I kill her enemies.”

“She’s my bodyguard." Romana added hastily. "I don't employ assassins."

“Huh. Explains the knife, I guess. I thought bodyguards had, you know, a bit more muscle.”

Leela frowned, her hand twitching towards her knife.

“I can assure you, Leela’s plenty dangerous.”

Leela was distracted from pressing the point further by the arrival of two officers.

“Duggan Smith?”

“Eh? What’d you wanna know for?”

“We’re arresting you on suspicion of conspiracy to commit theft.”

Duggan grimaced. “I still don’t speak French, but I have the horrible suspicion that I know what you’re saying.”

“Theft? If you were going down for anything I’d expect assault.”

The first man glanced at her. “You two had better come down as well.”

“Why?”

“Consorting with known criminals.”

“Are we under arrest, officer?”

The other one took her by the shoulder. “Should you be?”

Leela unsheathed her knife. “Touch her and it will be the last thing you ever do!”

  
-

  
“You should have let me at him!” Leela grouched, flexing her wrists, still red and raw from the cuffs.

“Punch first, ask questions later, always a good strategy.”

“Trust me, stab first, ask questions later would have caused more problems than it solved.” Romana turned to Duggan. “And _you_ still have some explaining to do.”

“Yeah, uh, sorry. I wasn’t entirely honest about the investigating art theft thing.”

“Let me guess. You’ve been hired to commit them instead.”

“The PI business dried up a few years back. What can I say? I’m a man for hire.” Duggan shifted uncomfortably. “Since it’s my fault you’re in here, I’m honour bound to break you out.”

“I was just going to hire a lawyer.”

 “We ain’t got time for _lawyers_.” He shook his head. “Now, step back ladies, I can handle this.” He kicked at door and swore loudly, gasping as he grabbed his foot. “Damn. They’re making them stronger.”

Leela walked to the back of the cell and charged at it, pounding at the door until it gave way.

Duggan blinked. “Ah, well, I softened it up for you.”

Romana stared at both of them. “…You two do know I have my sonic screwdriver, right?”

Leela shrugged. “This way was more fun.”

 

-

 

“Let me get this straight. You think we should help us assist you in your heist because your client tells you the painting was stolen originally?”

“Well, isn’t that what you and the Doctor did?”

“We stopped crimes, we didn’t commit them! Mostly.”

“You right wrongs.”

“We only have your client’s word that anyone was wronged.”

 “My boss is a respectable man!”

Romana raised an eyebrow. “Nice to know you’re working for respectable criminals, rather than the other kind.”

“Well, I mean, he’s not like a career criminal or nothing, he’s just a private collector. I wouldn’t get in with anyone dangerous.”

“ _You’re_ dangerous, given a blunt object of any form.”

“We should do it.” Leela said.

“Why?”

“It sounds fun.”

“That’s not a good enough reason to do something!”

“I asked you why we were going on holiday, you said to have fun.” Leela pointed out.

“This wasn’t quite what I had in mind.”

Leela shrugged. “Less corpses than Davidia.”

 

-

 

Romana sighed as a horde of security guards all too predictably descended on them. One day, she’d manage to have a normal holiday. No thefts, no dead Time Lords, no dangerous temporal experiments. Taking the priceless painting from Leela, who probably shouldn’t have been entrusted with it in the first place, she muttered, “Don’t kill anyone.”

Duggan rushed in and started to punch them with no semblance of strategy whatsoever. Leela knocked one out with a single thrust of her elbow and had the other three down within a few seconds.

Duggan stared at her, silent for a moment in hushed reverence. “Cor, you’re not one of them aliens too, are you?”

“No.” Leela stood up. “I am just very good at my job.”

“What happened to this being an easy operation?”

“Well, the alarms haven’t gone off. I was told there wouldn’t be many people on duty.” Duggan scratched his head.

 “You have been set up.” Leela paced around the men in a circle. “They knew we were coming.”

“You’re right,” Romana frowned, “look at their uniforms. They don’t work for the gallery.”

 “Indeed they don’t.” said a voice from the shadows.

Leela immediately grabbed him, knife at his throat. Her grip faltered and she stepped back, realising who it was.

He massaged his neck. “Thank you, Leela.”

“Mr Braxiatel sir!” exclaimed Duggan.

Romana blinked. “You’re behind all this?”

“He is always behind things.”

Romana looked slowly at the scene around them and then back to Brax. “If Duggan’s working for you… Someone tipped off the police, someone sent the guards… _Please_ don’t tell me you planned a heist and then sabotaged your own crime.”  

 “You _did_ say I could take some time off too.”

 _“_ Can’t you get a normal hobby?“

“What, like Narvin’s stamp collection?”

“That’s unsubstantiated rumour!”

“I was bored, you’d be surprised how little goes wrong without you two there, come on Romana. I needed a little plot to occupy my time! Your hobby’s dictating stories about-“

“I think we get the picture.” she interrupted, hastily.

 “Eh, so he’s your boss too?” asked a rather lost Duggan.

“Romana is _his_ boss.” Leela grinned, watching the two of them as if they were acting out a play for her benefit.

“And Braxiatel is in rather hot water with his boss right now.”

“Would you allow me to make it up to you, my lady? I could take you out to dinner this evening-“

“Don’t push it, Braxiatel.”

He bowed. “My lady.”

Romana passed the package back to him. “Get this painting back to where it belongs and we’ll see you back on Gallifrey.”

He paused. “I did actually want it for my-“

“Braxiatel.”

He bowed again. “My lady.”

Duggan scratched his head again. “Huh. Never thought I’d see Mr Braxiatel cowed like that. But hey, I told you my boss was a respectable gentleman.”

“I’m not so sure about that.”

 

-

Romana clicked her fingers and the doors to the TARDIS swung open. ”Well, I know we didn’t quite save the world but was that enough adventure for you?”  

“I am fine with returning. But Romana, we both know you did not do this on a whim. There was no terrible danger to stop, no reason to leave.”

Romana moved to the console, pushing some buttons in which was either an extremely intricate or completely random order. “Can’t I have just wanted a holiday? I don’t have masterplans, unlike _some_ people.”

“You would not leave your work to sleep if you did not have to. And this time, I did not threaten to leave.”

Romana kept her gaze firmly on the time rotor. “I don’t- Those dreams… I’m certain you leaving was a part of it. That you left and the Universe, Gallifrey, the timeline, it was all wrong, all wrong, all because I drove you away again. Time and time again I do something wrong and you walk away and- I just want that to stop.” She sat down on the TARDIS chair, still not looking anywhere near Leela. “I know I can be cold and distant and I never say what I mean and I know you think I sometimes look down on you without meaning it and I’m sorry. All I know, is that on the Axis, when you left, I felt so terribly lost and I had no idea how to fix it. Sometimes I thought I didn’t deserve for it to be fixed, that I’d done nothing to deserve friends.”

Leela moved over, resting her head on Romana’s shoulder. It was some time before she replied. “I am glad you have been thinking about it. I am glad you care. But I fear you will forget these words the next time peace is broken, the next time Gallifrey is in danger.” Leela could hear her heartsbeat, it seemed in tandem with the humming of the TARDIS, in harmony with the vortex spiralling in its centre, rising and falling and never stopping. She wondered, not for the first time, what being a Time Lord really meant. A strange kind of protectiveness surged in her, one that had nothing to do with any threat, perceived or otherwise. Romana wasn’t any Time Lord, she was hers.

“You change mood like the sea. You _change_ like the sea. It is hard to remember the person you once were, the one Pandora tricked again and again, the one who thought me lesser because I have only one beating heart and think of her as Romana. In the dreams, sometimes you change again and you are not her but not _you_ either and it is hard to think of her as Romana.”

“Leela, you know I can’t help that. But if it happens, it won’t be like Andred-“

“Andred changed like the sea too. One minute he was a brave lion, he was _mine_ , and the next he was a coward that spoke only in lies and breathed in deceit. But you are not like him, not really. When you are angry you rear up like a blaze and do not hide it in lies and pretence. When you _care_ you burn through all the rules that usually bind you and free yourself of reason. Reason is a liar.”

“I love you. But if you want me to stay for every beat my single human heart has left, listen and remember this. You do not like it when Braxiatel makes choices for you, no matter how much he says he knows better, no matter how much he knows. All I ask is that you trust me. That you talk to me instead of making all the choices on your own.”

Romana took Leela’s hand in hers. “I think I can do that.” Leela’s emotions flooded past her, distant but constant, like the pulse in her wrist. She pressed her forehead against Leela’s and suddenly they were bright and loud, love and fear and joy and something indescribable.

For a moment, she wished Leela could feel hers in return but she probably didn’t need telepathy for that. She had her instincts.

Romana coughed and jumped to her feet. “Back to Gallifrey?”

Leela smiled, pushing the lever Romana always pushed. “Back home.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like it, shinebrightlightanimon! I've always meant to write something with Romana and Leela in Paris so your prompt was perfect.


End file.
